darlings
will you indulge us for a moment?
we need your *listeningface*
oh.
that is good.
thank you.
So back in Nov 2011 we did the right thing and set up a proper company (technically an S Corp if you want the specifics)
We paid a lawyer and an accountant and Did It All Properly.
We opened a bank account with HSBC (you can see we are not holding back with any Pretend Names today).
And waited (patiently and prettily) for the book deal and contract and eventually the first part Of The Advance. (such a delicious word)
Then tried to put it into our special small business bank account.
Which had been Closed.
Without anybody sending us a nice note.
So we complained.
And tried to set up another bank account and got all confused because now we live in los Angeles but our corporation still lives in nyc so a California bank wouldn’t take our check/cheque – even though we have banked with HSBC since 1998 darling and at the Height of our corporate career you can imagine the nice sums they saw pass through and (now we’re really annoyed – we’ve transfered our Assets Under Management there too – 401K and market funds – before-this-all-just-went-down).
Harumph.
So we went Back to Nyc with all the paperwork and the bloody.check.
It All seemed to be very complicated (and we do hate complications. We enjoy clarity)
But we signed everything and showed our paperwork and the two tax returns (remarkably grown up yes) and there were Fed-Exs back and forth and we signed more materials and it all got more complicated.
but still no open bank account.
the Advance still sits in our bureau waiting to be deposited – SOMEWHERE.
But no.
Apparently it is not possible.
We are Furious.
And so we’re going to take them on…….
Because a woman with a pen is mightier than many swords (or something like that)
And a person with a blog is unstoppable.
Especially when they have a book deal.
And we are doing this for two people who will never know.
Both we are related to.
One was locked in a bank manager’s office in the mid 70s and you can imagine what almost happened.
She didn’t get the account put it that way
And another was refused entry to the casino because she didn’t have a signed slip from her husband
In 1984.
Yeah.
Times have changed.
Really?
Because we have a blog.
*cross*
we are Pretty Sure the bank account would be open if circumstances (gender) and fiscal irresponsibility (we don’t have debt or use unsecured credit – it makes no sense – illogical) were different.
so:
a. Let’s see how HSBC responds to this blog post and tweets and the other stuff we’re going to talk about
b. we are going to get a california business license (because we need one anyway) and then talk to Banks Here.
let’s see who is the most female friendly.
because it sure ain’t HSBC love.
*veryCross*
oh – sorry – of course we can give you a picture.
here’s Dawn over Los Angeles.
oh yes, that helped.
Pity that bank that crosses TeamGloria.
Horrors; You must stand up and be counted. I had a little confrontation with Samsung a while back; I won! And now I am about to do battle with another entity. I am a timid beast. Like you, I hate being cross, but I am SICK of ridiculous, nonsensical paper work. Speaking of which, I once couldn’t complete a transaction between NZ and the US because in the US a certain legal paper had to be on A3 paper but in NZ such papers are only ever on A4. By the way, I thought this line rather telling “a woman with a pen is mightier than many swords ‘ ….with a little stretch of the imagination it fits quite well with ‘we are Pretty Sure the bank account would be open if circumstances (gender)’ Well you have to stretch your imagination a lot but……did I make you giggle?
you did!
*smiling*
which is Always Excellent.
sending vast strength to you down in NZ for your bureaucracy and paper sizing (seriously?! paper sizing? blimey – yup – the insanity – thank goodness we have somewhere to go with all this strangeness ;-)
Indeed it is!
Go get the fuckers!
Good luck darling xx
*snort*
that felt very Carry On UP the banks.
How grand of you to stay so focused and properly angry at these Philistines! No mad flailings at walls (the Aubrey Chalet is covered in dents), flail with words and your mad intelligence!
well, we have been known to flail……
and then our tiny-fast-fingers-hit-the-keyboard and we Start To Plot.
Sorry to hear this saga especially as dealing with stuff like this takes up *so* much energy.
but we felt So Good sharing it ;-)
funny because back in the 80’s my dad also had a problem with them. remembering that, i have never opened an account there. tweet and hashtag away. and bombard them with old fashioned letters through the post as well!
thanks for understanding – we hate to get cross…..your kindness helps!
any recommendations of a good bank (although we are in the US- of A so hell, who knows.)
Whatever you do don’t go offshore major alerts there just go into a website that ranks banks in terms of solidity and guarantees. No Icelandic ones either!
good point.
*chewspencil*
#noIcelandicBanks
Oh but they have such lovely mountains, and stop chewing that pencil!
that’s true.
mountains are Very Nice.